Meanderings

So I'm going to New Zealand, as some of you may have gathered from previous posts. I'm really looking forward to it - though at the moment, I have to admit that the "looking forward to it" part is bullshit. I'm more...resigned to the fact that I bought tickets and ensured that I couldn't back out of the trip. Well, I could, but everyone would point and laugh, and that's never fun.

I'm not entirely sure why New Zealand. It's not like it's the number one destination in the world. Though it's prob'ly close, due to those little ole films by a certain Peter Jackson.

I guess...New Zealand has always held a particular fascination for me. My mother used to tell me stories when I was a child about when she went in the early 70s - in fact, one of the few photos I have of my mother with long hair is her standing (with flares tucked into ugh boots - oh the 70s) in front of Paekakariki post office. God only knows why she's standing in front of Paekakakriki post office, but as god doesn't exist, noone's really the wiser as to the circumstances leading up to the photograph being taken.

No, not even my mother. Her memory is really not what it used to be. Or maybe it is, and she's just always had a crappy memory.

And, really, who of my generation doesn't think of New Zealand every time they hear the words Greenpeace or Rainbow Warrior - and vice versa. That stays with those of us who grew up fearing nuclear armageddon, and fuelled our righteous indignation at the major governments, and, of course, led us to question the actions that those governments take. Oh. Sorry. Wrong meeting.

Then there's the little fact that Helen Clark stood New Zealand apart from Australia by not bowing to the will of the overlord, sorry, the US, and questioned the motivations behind the illegal invasion of Iraq - it made me love New Zealand even more, with it standing up to the greater powers of the world, and wearing it's ethics on it's sleeves and singing out "fuck you powerful nations, this little collection of islands is doing things their way".

Douglas Adams wrote a book called "Last Chance to See". The first chapter contained a description of flying over Milford Sound, and that description moved me to tears. The feelings it evoked were new to me, and resonate every time I think of New Zealand, or for that matter, Douglas Adams. That's some powerful scenery, right there.

And, of course, all Peter Jackson films ever. I got into Peter Jackson through Braindead, which remains one of my favourite films of all time. And Meet the Feebles is the perfect first date film - if your date can't make it through the film, or, heaven forfend, doesn't like it, then you know that it's not going to work out. Heavenly Creatures was the first film I ever saw Kate Winslet in, and I have been in lurve with her ever since. And, quite frankly, any writer/director who can make me actually like Michael J Fox in a movie, as Peter Jackson did in The Frighteners, has to be one of the greatest writer/directors of all time.

The first time I saw Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring was on January 1, 2002. I was hungover. I was depressed. I had just moved back to Sydney after coming out of a longterm relationship, September 11 had just happened and it seemed like the world was going to end. I cried from the moment I saw Hobbiton right to the end of the movie. I sobbed and howled when Boromir died. I felt changed after seeing this film. Middle Earth was so much more real to me through the films than it had been when I had read the book (I'm not a very visual reader, if that makes any sense whatsoever). What a way to start a new year, eh? With that beauty and spirit and love. So I made a new ritual for myself - every January 1 I would see the LotR movie. Bugger seeing it on opening day, it meant more to me as the start to a new year. This year, because there was no film (sob!) I watched the extended Return of the King.

When John Howard was reelected (how the FUCK did that happen??) my immediate response, and the response of nearly everyone I talked to, was "Let's move to New Zealand". There's something about New Zealand that calls to me, to all of us, who want something more out of the world. Who want to see the beauty of life when all we're given is horror. Who want to believe that human beings are good and noble and true, not selfish and arrogant and out for personal gain.

And yes, I know it's not perfect. No country is. No human being is. I saw the Dalai Lama in May 2002, and the feeling I had in his presence, pure serenity and contentment and wonder, is the feeling I get when I think about New Zealand. When I see pictures, when I watch films, when I read about it. It touches the spiritual part of me whose existence I had begun to question, and because of that, is a place to which I have to go.

And with that, I have managed to dispel the fugue state, and am starting to look forward to the trip. Next Monday, here I come!!